These Pages are provided by SRA survivors for the encouragement of others. Correspondence may be entrered into by email:
JESUS I was asked today how did healing come?
I'm not sure what to say, how to explain,
when it is all dependent on You.
For years I have been seeking freedom from pain,
a place to rest in You;
but the more I struggled, the less I gained,
because it is all dependent on You.

Not much of an answer in the midst of the pain
but the truth comes through in the heart.
For nothing could I do, nothing could I say
would take the burdens away.

I lay on the floor; in my bed; in the world;
soaked in the pain, tied down in the fear,
and in such a terrible mess.
No hope could I see, no hope to believe,
that there ever would be a way out.
When all I desired, all I wanted,
was to know and be known by You.

What answer can I give?
What hope to extend,
when so many are caught in this place?
How did we get here, where satan rules by fear
and all of the darkness consumes?

One breath at a time,
one beat of the heart;
straining and seeking for You.
Because we know in the pain
no answer can come, unless You
come to heal our hearts.
We need to know who You are,
see Your face, take in and absorb all of You 
to have hope begin its' fight,
for love and for life,
to open the prison doors.

Locked into the pain, overflowing with fear,
our lives are a blithering mess.
Yet deep in the unseen, where You meet us it seems
a light in the darkness begins.
What drives us to You?
The need is so strong, for You have made this connection with us.
For it's so easy to give up and die in the mess,
when the struggle for freedom costs so much.

But we see in Your Son, Father all we desire,
all our hope and peace rests in Him.
Just one second in Him is worth all of the struggle,
the days and the years of the fight.

We want to LIVE, really LIVE! 
With none of the pain
With none of the fear
With none of the darkness within.

Will You hear when we cry out aloud for Your help -
come rescue us from this place?
For every breath that we take might be our last
and we need You so much our LORD.
Why should we fear - for You know the right time,
when all is in place, for Your POWER to invade this cage.
To fight on our side as we gave You our life;
to bring down all the lies and lead us to rest in You.

I was taken by surprise,
not looking at all
when You came in Your loving desire;
to set me free, lead me out from the cage,
and welcome me home to rest.
It's as if TRUTH made His home and all could see
that there was nothing to fear and
what a wonderful LORD You are.
You held out Your hand to welcome us in
and in all of a rush we came.
Just to lay our face on Your breast, to breathe Your breath,
to hold You close in our heart.

Then we know as we're known.
What words can express the joy that floods the heart?

I haven't words to explain how healing has come
except knowing it's all about YOU.
Your desire for my heart,
Your desire for my life,
to be hidden and safe in YOU.

Lord please come to us all
in the mess and the pain,
as we drown in this terrible place.
For Your life You have given,
paid, ransomed, forgiven
and there's no other way out but by Grace.


Altogether lovely, altogether beautiful is He who
comes upon the mountain tops.
He comes clothed in splendour, fragrant as spices,
wrapped in His glory.
My heart longs for the Lover of my soul.

I have searched through the long nights,
as the deep waters engulfed me.
Through the deep valleys where darkness reigns.
Held tight and entombed in the depths of the earth,
my heart cried out "Who will rescue me?  Who knows of my pain?
Who can save me from this death?"

He heard my cry from the depths of the earth,
the faintest of sighs.
Through the deep waters He brought me,
breathed His life into my dead places.
From deep despair He has rescued me,
from the very pit of Hell He has brought me.
He, who is my hope, the Lover of my soul.

He carried me in His arms of grace and soaked
my torn and bleeding heart with His love.
He makes me whole.
He brought to bear the fullness of His life
poured out for me on Calvary.
At one blast of His breath, one glance of His eyes,
my enemies are defeated, they are no more.

For His love is as strong as death,
many waters cannot quench it.
He has set me as a seal upon His heart,
as a seal upon His arm.
My heart belongs to "The Lord, my Hope",
the Lover of my soul.
For His love and promises stand true forever,
He is the Faithful One.

I love you Jesus.


Welcome Jesus, will you tarry awhile
with me in this quiet place?
I long to gaze upon your countenance
to search your eyes of love.
Your tears have saturated me
like a river in full flood.
Washed me clean, restored my soul
in this dry and thirsty place.

Your breath has filled my heart with hope,
spiced with the wine of your sacrifice.
Your mouth kisses me with love,
how I long for your touch.
The melody of your voice fills me full of joy,
you restore my strength.

I see your ear turned to my voice, to hear
the softest of words spoken in many places.
I am overcome by your words spoken that I have heard.
Long have I waited for your words of love and hope.

As your head rests upon mine,
I smell the fragrance of your desire.
Enriched by longing, spiced in suffering,
released in the Most Holy place.

Strength and peace enfold me in your embrace,
heart to heart, deep to deep.
Your love draws me ever deeper and,
in that place of rest, we become one.
I in You and You in me, O Three in One,
Father, Son and Holy Spirit.


Father I thank you that I am your child,
bought at a great price.
You covered me with your love,
made a home for me in your heart.

For so long I have wandered far from you,
not knowing or understanding your grace.
So much pain clouded my eyes,
kept me from seeing your face.

Jesus has brought me to you, Father,
washed clean by His precious blood.
He has revealed your heart for me,
so much mercy, grace and love.

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy," my heart cries out.
"Welcome home my child," your whispered reply.
Safe at last, complete in You,
I have found my Resting place.


"Today, today you hear MY voice,
I speak to your heart with songs of joy.
Come away with me, my beloved one,
there is room in my heart today."

I say: "I'm a mess my Lord,
full of shame and a jumble inside.
I desire to be yours but mess things up,
far away, so have I been defiled."

"Come, come to ME, I wash you clean.
See my grace, my Cross stands tall.
Do not be afraid, I love you still;
my blood restores, my breath brings life.

"Don't pass me by, come quickly Lord.
Fill me anew this day.
You are my hope, a sure foundation;
abide in me I pray."

"Be assured my love, my heart's desire,
nothing can separate my love from you.
I died and live to make you whole;
secured in ME, your life's restored."

"Jesus, no words can express my need for You.
Keep me close to your heart of love.
Each day I lay me down and wait,
until I see you face to face."


Rich love, you are rich in love.
So powerful, so everlasting,
so beautiful.
Our God of Love, you are.

Nothing separates us from your love;
no height, no depth, no width.
Poured out for us on Calvary,
Jesus, the fullness of your love.

You gave to us your only Son,
a gift from heaven above.
That from our sin a WAY became,
a LIFE expressed through LOVE.

No words describe your gift of love,
so freely you have given.
Jesus, Saviour of all the earth;
The Lamb who was slain and is risen.

All thanks to you, our God of Love,
your children praise Your Name.
With thankful hearts, our lives we give,
so He might truly reign.


Here I rest in your grace.
You fill me up, safe at last.
How I have longed for this day,
for all the days of my life.

From baby born has darkness reigned,
buried deep no light came forth.
Shattered to pieces, destroyed forever,
scrap heaped, and so very unclean.

Out of the darkness they came to devour,
ripped to pieces, consumed in their power.
Heart and limbs torn asunder.
Where to turn, where to escape  free from their power?

Into the darkness, unravelled by fear,
terror and trauma companions a near.
"Come little ones, come to your own",
shackled to Death, bidden and owned.

A glimpse in the darkness of glories unknown;
of hope ever rising, squashed deep into fear.
No freedom from torment or resting place found;
can no one come find us, bring us home safe and sound?

Noises, noises everywhere.
Voices, voices fill the air.
Chaos fills the void;
empty, cold, alone  exposed.

Can they see, do they care of evil deeds done everywhere?
Blood and guts, hearts ripped out;
life and limb are sacrificed  -   all for him.

From ages past, eons ago
a Voice cries out, a Voice is heard.
Saving grace, a love unknown.

Tears from heaven, a sob comes forth,
comes flooding sound, a truth rings out.
My Saviour's Name, my Saviour's Voice,
His life for mine, my life restored.

Can this be true? Can this be hope?
Come find us Lord, come seek us out.
Don't let us go, my trembling sigh,
hold us close through these dark nights.

My strength, my shield, my hiding place.
A resting place upon His breast.
From the depths to the heights I finally rise,
into His clasp, safe and found at last.


SORROW, SORROW, grief and trouble.
Drowning, gasping, bleeding, dying.
Death a threat, death an answer;
caught between, exhausted trying.

Slip me under, buried deep.
No eye can see me, no answer give.
Tangled, mangled, torn asunder;
strength depleted, none can live.

WEEPING, gnashing, WEEPING, drowning.
SORROW coming like a flood.
Tears and torment, rushing, flooding;
Who can save me from this Death?

Evil smelling, evil sounding, evil coming like a flood,
soaking, filling, covering, sliding;
deeper darkness, covered in blood.

Dirty outside, dirty inside,
drowning in this bloody mess.
Slipping, sliding, no escaping,
tangled in the web of Death.

Daddy, Mummy, foes abounding,
roaring, calling, no escape.
Moaning, gasping "Save me, save me
from this dark and dreadful Death."

Is there no one come to save me?
Breathing, living, sighing, dying.
Do I shout it from the roof tops?
Is there naught to hear my cries?
No one sees me, no one cares.

Mind a whirling, mind a twirling,
crazy laughter, thoughts a scatter.
Bombs exploding, pain abounding;
silent screaming, flesh is reeling;
knives descending, spiders biting.
Drinking, drinking from this cup.

Heart to heart, breath to breath,
hope restored, come to rest.
In Your arms, safe and sound,
LIFE in You is to be found.

Peace at last, like a river,
flowing, filling, strength to strength.
BEAUTY calling, making, changing
hearts to wholeness, pure and clean.

Dreaming, hoping, looking, yearning,
drinking deeply of Your love.

Daddy, daughter, friend and lover
come together, seeking, finding.
Face to face, delighting, needing,
belonging, knowing, seeing.
Heart to heart and breath to breath.

The cup of suffering deep and wide,
reeling, roiling, drunk with lust.
Demanding, calling, never ceasing;
watching, waiting, ever ready.

Bits and pieces, torn and broken,
never matching, lost and lonely;
helpless in the dark, dank ground.

Bad and wretched, dark and dirty,
useless nothing, worthless grub.
Python hissing, dragon fiery,
beating of the drums in blood.

Bodies writhing, screams abounding,
innocence consumed in fire.
Dancing, prancing, faces leering,
fingers poking, nothing hidden.

Hope exploded, body shattered.
Nothing held in thought or mind.
No longer knowing, just existing,
kept forever in the double bind.


LORD, many years ago You asked me a question
"Who do you say you are?"
I had no idea, covered in shame, in all sorts of places -
there was no knowing, all of me in hiding.

Little did I know it, little comprehend,
the struggle and torment as I searched for the answer.
I looked inside of me and out of me too.
Did all I could to find out the answer, to be understood.

"Who are you?" rang in my head and my heart.
"Can you find me, do you know where I live?"
In many places, deep in the darkness;
out at the boundaries between heaven and earth.

Little by little You took me apart,
cancelled the curses, demolished the strongholds.
You opened up dungeons, came out in the desert;
looked in deep waters, searched in the stars.

With TRUTH you did open the prison doors wide;
broke off the chains that bind us, the torment and fear.
Banished the enemies, washed off the lies;
gave me new garments, healing and life.

For all the cries of "Why don't You do something?
When is enough?"  the answer has come.
You poured out Your life and cross, brought them to bear;
with tears and gladness and unending love.

You gathered the babies, the children, them all,
and brought them to safety in Father's abode.
You came for Your Princess asleep in her casket,
waiting in silence, showing no life.

Your timing is perfect though the struggle is long;
from the dawn of the ages has the answer been known.
Freedom unending, peace in my heart,
LOVE all encompassing sets me apart.

You put me together, when all was undone;
not a moment longer than should have been done.
Nothing could I do, depending on grace,
waiting and hoping, seeking Your face.

Thank you my Father, my Jesus, my love.
For in searching the question I have found who I am.
When I look at You Jesus, and know as I'm known,
then comes the answer, then I come home.


Slipping on and slipping of,
feet for shoes and shoes for people.
Which ones should we wear together,
pink ones, heeled ones, boots or slippers?

Buying one pair, buying five pairs.
Why stop there with feet for others?
She likes these ones, he wants those ones,
ballet dancing, shoes for running.

Such a scramble, late as usual,
trying this pair, then try that pair.
Which ones fit with who is present?
Do these match or change the outfit?

Soon the wardrobe is all a jumble,
no more room for the next bundle.
Count them up and come out sighing;
say goodbye to all the worn ones



There is a Cup of Suffering
that is different from the rest.
This One has His heartbeat
and was given for our Rest.

He walked this road of suffering,
a choice that He had made;
in obedience to the Father's will,
the price of sin He paid.

He knows about our trials,
the struggle and the pain.
Yet came He to the earth
so a pardon we might gain.

He said if we would follow
along this road with Him;
our cross we daily pick up,
we would receive release from sin.

Then He would come within us,
His Kingdom reign begin;
and we would live forever
to give glory unto Him.


You say You come to us
when we seek Your face.
But we can't do it alone Lord,
we need Your embrace.
For we do not know the pathway,
except in You, Jesus.
We need you Holy Spirit to guide us,
we pray.

For our hearts are longing,
yearning all the day;
to see You our Saviour,
to know of Your love.
Come guide us and lead us,
please show us Your Way;
and bring us to know You,
as You guide our way.

For there is only One Saviour,
only One Way;
and though we may stumble,
Your Light is our way.
Come to us our Jesus,
come to us, we pray.


new file: 7/16/96
The State of Illinois
Public Act #87-1167
Effective January 1,1993
Be It Enacted by the Legislature of the State of Illinois:


(a) A person is guilty of a felony when he commits any of the following acts with, upon, or in the presence of a child as part of a ceremony, rite, or similar observance:

1.actually or in simulation, tortures, mutilates or sacrifices
any warm-blooded animal or human being;

2.forces ingestion, injection or other application of any
narcotic drug, hallucinogen or anaesthetic for the purpose of
dulling sensitivity, cognition, recollection of, or resistance to
any criminal activity;

3.forces ingestion or external application of human or animal
urine, feces, flesh, blood, bones, body secretions, non-
prescribed drugs or chemical compounds.

4.involves the child in a mock, unauthorized or unlawful
marriage ceremony with another person or representation of
any force or deity, followed by sexual contact with the child;

5.places a living child into a coffin or open grave containing a
human corpse or remains;

6.threatens death or serious harm to a child, his or her
parents, family, pets, or friends which instills a well-founded
fear in the child that the threat will be carried out; or

7.unlawfully dissects, mutilates or incinerates a human

Several states have enacted laws prohibiting ritual abuse of children. The wording in each state is nearly identical to the Illinois law.